I do not care if it rains all week, I am happy to be alive.
And guess what, my wish is coming true. The forecast is for seven days of showers. The best news is that my garden will get daily watering as the plants establish themselves. And then the days going into Memorial Day will be dry, calm and sunny. We are planning to have no more than 10 local family members gather around our fire pit and roast hotdogs from a respectable social distance.
Then it’s on to the smores.
A year ago, anticipating anything was not possible. It was hard just to imagine how I was going to get through the day. To plan anything was beyond my grasp. I still will have an off day now and again, but that up against the wall feeling has not appeared in many months.
And as I think about it, “those thoughts” have been absent for more than a month.
What a relief to notice that my daily thoughts center around the present. My goal has been to practice living in the present. Not time traveling to the past or the future has been a victory for me as I recover from major depressive disorder. If my mind paid frequent flyer miles, I could travel the world for free.
Today is full.
I have hung out the birdfeeders and made my lunch to take to work. I have spent time with my wife and have checked all of the flowering plants and vegetables we just purchased. While I have already planted many of them, I plan to get the rest in the ground before work tomorrow.
But now it’s time to get ready for my day job.
So I mark today as “doing OK, just happy to be alive.”
My concealed depression is written under the alias “Depression is not my boss.” I have certifications in SMART Recovery and am a Global Career Development Facilitator.
Diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder last year, I am sharing what I learn. If you know someone who might benefit from reading this, please share.
I always appreciate your comments.