I knew living with depression was not going to be a cake walk. There are challenges and setbacks, successes and snags in my recovery. Now I find out that there is response and remission. I know I was thinking of my recovery as remission. How naive is that? Speaking with my Peer Advocate today, I…
Tag: SMART Recovery
Today I am thinking about the quality of life
In Smart Recovery, the 4-Point Program includes #4, Living a balanced life. As I recover from and learn how to live with depression, I am seeing what a balanced life looks like for me. And I know there is work to do to achieve it. I have written many blog posts about understanding that it…
Everybody wants me, but do I want myself?
This seems to be the question of the day. What do others see in me that I am not seeing in myself? Why does my mind gravitate to all the things I could a, shoulda, would a done, and dismiss or minimize the good, dare I say, great things I have accomplished? When I begin…
What a week, and it’s only Tuesday
I know I should be thankful. I am alive, I am in good health, and my depression is not pushing me up against the wall. But boy do I feel rushed. Or maybe it’s a sense of urgency to get things done. It could be I am making a big deal out of what I…
Testing 1,2,3. Checking in to see if I am OK
Sometimes, I just need to check in with myself. Well, ever since I acknowledged that I have had depression for the past 43 years, I have felt the need to check in with myself, to see what is going on. My goal is to keep depression out in the open, where I can keep an…
I’m spinning a lot of plates today
Who doesn’t get caught up in things occasionally? I am not bemoaning being busy. I chose that over retirement. Well, I chose busy over feeling anxious. Busy over wallowing in the depths of depression, busy instead of not being here at all. When I think of it that way, I have no room to bitch…
I’m feeling partly cloudy this morning. Is there a storm ahead?
It’s not all or nothing. Feeling a little dull this morning doesn’t mean the end of the world s coming. In fact, just getting up has helped with the cloudiness. And then pouring a mug of black coffee and heading out to the front porch has helped, too. Maybe my cloudiness is related to the…
How can you be in control and have depression?
Being in control is powerful. Feeling helpless, not having control can be debilitating and unhealthy. I have been on both sides of the aisle lately. Sometimes I have felt in control and at other times have allowed myself to feel helpless, to be the victim in the situation. Linking my control issues to depression has…
Flashback Friday – Was I really like this?
I read a few of my early blog posts this morning. Some of them I wrote just days after getting out of the hospital. There is a lot of uncertainty in these early posts. I am feeling my way towards something, but I wasn’t sure what it was. Check out this post I wrote 3…
All I need is a couple of days off
The final cost of my trip to Chicago is almost paid. Today is the 7th day in a row of work before I have a day off. My days off for the SMART Conference wrapped around last week’s schedule and so I have worked straight through since last Wednesday. That’s 9 hours+ of actual work,…
