Last night I had a virtual therapy appointment. I remember my therapist had asked a question and I was responding. It was my side of the story I was relating. Not just the facts or my feelings about it, but I was defending my actions. My decision and why I made it was a source of pride I suppose. My therapist stopped me and said, “I hear rationalization.” He had caught … [Read more...] about My Psychiatrist Asked Me, “When Is Enough, Enough”?
For some reason, I envisioned a breakthrough session last night. By the end of the zoom meeting, I thought all my cares would be lifted and I would have found a nugget of truth I could work with until the next session. My anticipation of our first meeting under the new framework was hard to contain. After all, we had done some great work together. It was February 5th when … [Read more...] about Getting Back to Therapy Wasn’t What I Expected
Predictable, steady, expectable, certain, sure, unsurprising, humdrum, obvious, and foreseeable. That is my life. And that has been my life for several months. I guess it is always something. And depression has clouded my life with generous helpings of unhelpful thinking. A year ago, I was fixated on not being able to get started in the morning. It took five months of … [Read more...] about What Depression Doesn’t Want You To Know About Unhelpful Thinking Styles
I see eyes and a mouth ready to eat me if I get too close. That’s what I see as I sit in my therapist’s office waiting for my appointment. Maybe I watched too many cartoons as a child. I see the raised couch cushion forming an upper lip, while the frame underneath becomes the bottom of the mouth. And the tops of the sofa arms, become eyes. But if I go over, all I will … [Read more...] about What You See May Not Be What You Get
It turns out, my insurance is not covering my former therapy visits. $874 is quite a chunk to swallow when you think that, at worst, you are responsible for a $15 co-pay. I know, it is my responsibility to follow up on my insurance. I sign the papers that say I will be the responsible party if the insurance does not pay. Well, the insurance did not pay. Now, however, I … [Read more...] about I was Nervous About Switching Therapists