I went to my psychiatrist because I felt things were beginning to slide. Having months of relief from the crippling actions of depression, things had plateaued. I noticed that things were only OK. Not bad, not great, not really anything but OK. Each day was beginning to be the same. There was this feeling that I wasn’t making progress, that I was stalled, and she set up … [Read more...] about Day Five – I Think Adding Prozac Is Helping
Trying to measure my anxiety may make me anxious. Understanding how I am feeling today is not a bad thing. Then looking at the answer compared to how I was feeling five days ago can be helpful. I can judge by this quick exercise whether the new medicine is working. This morning, I am leaning towards “less anxious.” Now I still have a list of things to do today. I have … [Read more...] about Will I Be Less Anxious Today?
High-functioning depression, that’s me. I can fake it like the best of them. Hiding my true feelings is an art form for me. There are so many ways I can tell you “I’m fine, I'm excited, I’m darn glad to be here.” In some ways, this is always true. Being anywhere is always preferable to the alternative. But being myself in every situation is difficult. And letting … [Read more...] about With Depression, Am I Ready To Tell the Truth to My Psychiatrist? – Part I
Asking for professional medical help was one of the hardest things I have ever done. I started writing the morning after I was released from the hospital. In 5 North, I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder, with suicidal ideation. Feeling up against the wall, seeking professional medical advice was the least hard of the three choices I felt I had. Choice #1 was to … [Read more...] about After Getting Help for Myself, I Can Now Share with Others
It was the 4th of July yesterday and I got distracted. I have an alarm set on my phone to bring in the birdfeeders around dusk. This removes them from harm before the bears come by. Well, between going to my sisters for a picnic supper (outside with mostly social distancing) and setting off a few fireworks when back at home, I forgot to bring in the bird feeders. The … [Read more...] about Knowing What to Do and Doing it Are Two Different Things