Depression told me it was an innocent slip, but I’m sure it was Freudian. I was sitting in the small office of my gym, re-registering. We were talking about getting back and without being asked, I volunteered that I had stopped because of Covid. This was true in a way, but it was not the real reason I stopped going. I stopped going to the gym because I had been in 5 East … [Read more...] about Now Back at The Gym, I Used Covid Instead of Depression for Why I Left
Well, it was going to be my New Year’s resolution if I got around to making new year’s resolutions. For the past 6 weeks or so, I have been wondering why I was feeling so rushed. This led to my decision that I wasn’t setting aside any self-care time. Every day had become full of life’s needs, and I found myself gravitating towards everyone else’s needs. My resolution then … [Read more...] about I Broke My New Year’s Resolution After Only 4 Days
High-functioning depression, that’s me. I can fake it like the best of them. Hiding my true feelings is an art form for me. There are so many ways I can tell you “I’m fine, I'm excited, I’m darn glad to be here.” In some ways, this is always true. Being anywhere is always preferable to the alternative. But being myself in every situation is difficult. And letting … [Read more...] about With Depression, Am I Ready To Tell the Truth to My Psychiatrist? – Part I
I have been afraid to write about this subject. While people who have suicidal ideation will get it, the vast majority of people do not understand this or are afraid to talk about it. For 43+ years, I was afraid of getting anywhere near the subject. It turns out, I have a major depressive disorder, with suicidal ideation. My suicidal thoughts are not an everyday … [Read more...] about “Those Thoughts,” Are They My Suicidal Ideation?
Who would think you would need spell check for a four-word truck sign? On my way to work yesterday, I ended up behind a tandem dump truck. No big deal, except I would rather be behind a vehicle I can see over, around or through. This helps me feel more confident as I drive. But in heavy traffic, I can make it work. As we got to a traffic light, I really looked at … [Read more...] about Can you see the obvious?