It has been months since it I've had a sucicidal thought. And while I know that I am not circling the drain, it is still a bit unnerving to have a suicidal thought flash in my head. Things have really been going well. I am healthy and am finally beginning to shed some of my Covid pounds. There have been many positive occasions in the past few months. A wedding, a first … [Read more...] about Why Is Depression Having Me Think the S-Word Again?
When asked how I am doing, I can once again say “I’m doing good.” I know this because I am making plans again. When I was circling the drain, I could not envision a future. Heck, I was having trouble seeing the edge of the drain. And feeling up against the wall made it almost impossible to see or feel anything. Making it through the day was often the high point. When I am … [Read more...] about My Depression Is Better, But Where Is Happy?
At least that is how it feels today. Today I had a 3-month update with my psychiatrist who is handling my depression medicine. When asked how I was doing, I could confidently say, “I am doing very well.” And I mean it. We agreed I would stay on 300 grams of Wellbutrin XL and that I would see her in 4 months this time. I left feeling good. Yet on the ride home, I admitted … [Read more...] about Blog Post #400 – Why My Depression’s Aftermath Never Ends
Today, I am alive and thriving. However, I know that: My two-year journey towards recovery has not been a straight line upward. In fact, shortly after getting out of the hospital, I wasn’t even sure there was a line. Or that there was a path forward. Two years later, it is getting easier to see my future. And I am back to planning future activities. This is … [Read more...] about Two Years Later, My Depression Has Lifted
I admitted that I was feeling good to my Psychiatrist on Wednesday. My 3-month medicine management appointment was first thing in the morning. I was early, as usual, and I caught up on my email using my phone while waiting for my doctor. My Psychiatrist was happy to see me. She told me that when she checked her appointments last night, she was thrilled to see I was her … [Read more...] about Pure Joy With Depression? It Makes Me Feel Good All Over