It is clear to those around me that something was on my mind. I’ve never been very good at hiding things, even though that was one of the main tasks that depression wanted me to focus on. Secrets were and are one of depression’s tools that kept me listening to it and it alone. I…
Tag: depression and anxiety
I’m sending up flares, but no one see’s my SOS
I have let my self-care take a back seat to the events unfolding around me. I’ve tried to send signals that something is not right. This includes saying to people “something is not right.” I’ve been writing about how I have had major trouble getting out of bed in the morning. This has been an…
When will I get to write?
Instead of writing over the past few days, life happened . The past few days have been non-stop. I have worked six days in a row, traveling 1 2/2 hours each way. Then there was the 3+ hour commute in the snowstorm. This was followed by the unexpected invitation to go to the movies yesterday….
What a terrible thing to say
I can’t believe those were the first words out of my mouth. The day had really ended well despite taking three hours to drive in the heavy, wet snow to work. It turns out the winter storm tracked east, at about the same speed as I was traveling east. I kept thinking it was going…
The end is the beginning?
I am not sure where I stand today. This lagging sense of dullness has not passed. It has been there in one form or another for weeks. Let me say right here that it is not that way 100% of the time. I have had some special moments over the holidays that I will treasure….
Get up, get up, get up!
This is starting to be a broken record. Why can’t I just get up? Last night I went to bed just before 10 PM. I set my alarm for 7 AM. This gave me an extra hour of sleep beyond the “8” I require. Of course, even 8 hours of sleep is probably an hour…
Here I come depression, it’s time you moved along
We are four days into a new decade. This, to me, is a bigger deal than just starting a new year. There is a responsibility to the new decade. I want to make sure I am prepared and focused. You only get this chance once every 10 years. I don’t want to waste this. I…
Getting up is still an issue
I thought with the new year, things would change. My attitude towards getting out of bed in the morning has not been moved by the beginning of a new decade. While not quite as dramatic as going from 1999 to the year 2,000, a new decade, to me, is a chance to reevaluate my life…
My gratitude journal is written in my actions
It has been a while since I have written in my gratitude journal. Many years ago, this practice was suggested by one of my mentors. He had been successfully using it after reading the 2006 bestselling book, The Secret, by Rhonda Bryne. It is based on the belief of the law of attraction, which claims…
“I know that’s going to leave a mark”
The last year of this decade was overly complicated, frightening and dramatic. It started off in January of 2019 with waking up not being able to breath. It wasn’t that there was no air, it was as if someone had taken the life-giving oxygen out of the air that I was breathing in. I would…
