Why do I feel “I am NOT enough?” All I need is one more certification and then I can really be effective in my side business. Once I achieve my goal of going to the gym 5 times a week,, then life will be fine. When I have X number of dollars a month coming…
Category: therapy
Today I am thinking about who I am writing for
What a pompous ass I have been. The reason I started blogging was an attempt on my part to figure out some order in the chaos brought on by my depression. With 43+ years of practice concealing it, saying I have depression is a new idea. And then working on the sneaky ways it invents…
Three things I do to not be S.A.D. when I fall back
The days are getting shorter, that is clear. The shortest day of the year will be here in less than two months. Darkness comes in the mid-Atlantic states by 6 PM now, and the days are still getting shorter. In early summer, it wasn’t getting dark until almost 9 PM. What a difference. Seasonal Affective…
A week and a half seemed like forever
It was the longest I have been away since I was in the hospital. Knowing my schedule was going to be crowded, I got into two meetings the week before. Then I worked eight days straight in order to be off to travel. And yesterday, even though I was back, I had an appointment with…
You will never guess the new name I learned for my depression.
Keeping depression out in the open requires constant attention. Ignoring it, or worse, assuming I am “over it,” has dire consequences. As I learn to live with depression, I am learning more and more about how it works. I am learning how secretive it wants to be, and how tempting it can be to follow…
After reading this, I’m not sure I have Concealed Depression
I was sure it was Concealed Depression. After all, I had hidden it for 43 years before finally facing it. I am just now wrapping my arms around the idea that I have a mental illness, and then I read an article that may change what I call it. That should be exciting. I am…
Depression will not be my crutch
Depression is a disease, not a crutch. Many diseases get major attention and major funding for research. Their existence is not questioned and their status as a legitimate health condition is secure. Very few people, for example, would dispute the fact that cancer is real. People respect the havoc it can inflict on someone. Mental…
Going to Area 51
This morning I went to check out Area 51. Well, it felt like that was where I was going. The real name is Region 10 Wellness Recovery Center. To me, the idea of going was otherworldly. One of the written instructions for my discharge was that I find a Psychiatrist in the healthcare community who…
