What he told me was life changing. Getting out of bed each morning has been drama. Most days, I launch an internal dialogue with myself, which ends in my feeling guilty about staying in bed. Then at some point, a sound triggers my “fight or flight” response, and I leap out of bed. This scenario…
Category: Medication
Inconceivable! A Freeze Warning in Central Virginia in Mid-May
Is that why the unexpected is unexpected? Dealing with this unexpected change in temperature reminds me that life is not straight-forward. Yet here I am figuring out how to get all my geraniums and Boston ferns inside. And the climbing Mandevilla vine is already in a huge planter on the porch with a trellis attached…
Pandemic Closings Aside, My Depression Recovery is Still Open For Business
I am having trouble managing my thoughts and feelings with so many of my resources closed. I’m blaming my lack of motivation on not having face to face meetings. And my recovery feels stalled. In SMART Recovery, I have learned that at the heart of recovery lies their 4-Point Program. My journey has taken me…
What is Depression and Why Do I Have It?
Beginning my second year with Major Depressive Disorder, I am still not leading a balanced life. Now things are certainly much, much better than they were a year ago. I have hope and can see a way forward. Last year, I was up against the wall and saw NO way forward. It was all abyss….
22 Things I’ve Tried to Get Out of Bed with Depression
Ok, where am I going with this? Am I trying to disassociate myself from depression or am I trying to get out of bed first thing in the morning? I have been thinking, again, about why I cannot get started in the morning. Ever since November, I have struggled to begin the day. If I…
I’ve Worn Out My Snooze Alarm
It seems it is possible to hit your snooze alarm too many times. And when you do, it stops working. I get that my alarm clock is a man-made device, and it has a life expectancy just like other man-made things. But this alarm clock and I have been through so much. I bought it…
Why Can’t I Outwit This Squirrel?
It should be so easy to keep a squirrel from getting into the bird feeder. You put up a squirrel guard, make sure the feeder is far enough away from trees squirrels can jump from, and the birds have free reign. Of course, that is the textbook version of what to do. The reality is,…
What do you mean there are side effects?
I didn’t even think about how my medicine works. I hadn’t realized that there are three classes of anti-depression drugs. Each one works in a different way to help you achieve some sense of normalcy. Different kinds of reuptake inhibitors target different neurotransmitters. There are three types: Selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) are some of the…
Guess what? I am just like everyone else
For some reason, I thought I was special. I was sure that certain things only happened to me. My life and experiences are unique, but I was positive that my trials and tribulations were one of a kind, no one had ever lived through what I have lived through. Generally, I think this way in…
There are still doors my keys do not open
The problem is not all or nothing. Although it feels like that when I am stuck, immobile and indecisive. Once the day gets going, I am better equipped to use the tools I have learned to meet and defeat problems as they come my way. Between SMART Recovery, WRAP training, Peer Support at On Our…
