Why can’t I set boundaries between work and downtime? What is stopping me from saying, "I need a day off?" Well, I have been saying to myself for a while that I need some downtime, a short vacation. I just haven’t done it, I haven't taken action. Depression has me convinced that the house will burn down if I take a day off. In fact, if I take 2 ½ hours and get on the riding … [Read more...] about If depression is not my boss, why can’t I take a vacation?
worries
Why just rewriting my negative scripts didn’t help
Searching online for resources about mental health, I came across a group in the UK. They offer many free downloads of handouts and offer workshops if you live near them. I downloaded their “7 key points to achieve a resilient mindset.” Click the link and you can get a copy. This got me thinking about how I am scripting my thoughts about my daily focus. I have been spending … [Read more...] about Why just rewriting my negative scripts didn’t help
What do my days look like?
After 52 blog posts, I’m having a “moment.” Until this morning, I have been overflowing with things to write about. When I pull out the laptop and sit down in a chair on the front porch, the words have just poured out of me. Well today, they are colliding. I can’t make sense of any of them. I can’t get past the first paragraph. I’ve been here before. I should know that this … [Read more...] about What do my days look like?
Why can’t I let my guard down?
Getting in touch with my emotions is part of the healing process. While I am expressing more of them, I am still playing my cards, in certain situations, close to the vest. I don't let people see behind the mask. Let me give you an example. In the group meetings I am attending, I am completely transparent. I have held absolutely nothing back. It feels good to share … [Read more...] about Why can’t I let my guard down?
“Does it even matter?” Hey, that’s the depression talking.
I’m all over the board today. Thinking about, obsessing about, how I will spend my days has really set off a chain of thoughts in my mind. And some realizations. The Prozac must be working as intended. I have not had any suicidal thoughts in days. Not that I have ever acted upon them. Suicidal ideation is the clinical term they used when I was in the hospital. I am told … [Read more...] about “Does it even matter?” Hey, that’s the depression talking.